Emotional Terrors in the Workplace: Protecting Your Business Bottom Line - Emotional Continuity Management in the Workplace

2017-07-07 02:10:07

You are a whole person! In an ideal world with ideal people, the whole person should have a repertoire and set of recipes for creating a wonderful life, at home and at work. Everyone else on the rest of the planet must strive for such balance on a daily basis. Healthy people have a plan and a process to care for their physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well-being. This book would be remiss if it avoided the whole person in favor of one of these four foundations of well-being. Take ample time to review your foundations for health as you define them. Favoring one of the four cornerstones while ignoring the others leads to operating in an unbalanced state. Doing a daily practice, discipline, or treatment of some kind in each category will keep you balanced no matter what comes your way. You need to be balanced when standing in the presence of change. Balance does not mean fixed ” it can mean staying in one position for a long time, or being alert and ready to spring into action. All athletes have ways to strengthen their balance because they know how important it is to motion. Are your foundations balanced or do you put all your energies into one category at the expense of the other three?

Create your own self-care practice. First, fill in the chart provided with what you do now in each category. Then, with a colored pen or pencil, collage, or other creative form, add what you would like to change or add to your self-care regimen in the next weeks, months and years . Use the examples provided to being thinking about your self care.

PHYSICAL: Exercise, diet, grooming and hygiene, movement, temperature, senses (vision, taste, touch, hearing, smelling) observing art, dancing , wearing different colors and textures, hugs or handshakes, good hand washing, breathing deeply in the morning air, music, trying different foods , a day of silence.

SPIRITUAL: Exploring the relationship you have with whatever or whoever it is you think is in charge of the universe. Making that relationship a priority. Find a spiritual or religious practice that is yours.

MENTAL: Challenging yourself in areas of non-expertise, in other words, if you read all the time. take a break. If you never read, pick up a book. If you read nonfiction, take a break with a cheesy novel , and if all you ever read is cheese, pick up a biography. It is okay if you take four years to read a book. It is the willingness that is important. Go to an opera, or stay at home and play a board game. Do crossword puzzles, or start a non-profit organization and build a board of directors. Do more, or do less, but do it awake.

EMOTIONAL: Your feelings matter mostly to you, but they do matter. You are human because you have discernment and feel differently about different things. At the end of life people generally do not regret having had a full life with emotions. If they regret , it is that they missed feeling something because they were not paying attention in the moment.

Personal Toolkit

How to Enhance Your Emotional Value as a Manager

Avoid critical behaviors

Remember to express your highest ideals

Humor is appropriate when it is appropriate

Remember the big picture of the mission

All critical incidents are temporary so take the extra moments to make certain you are responding at your highest level

Feelings and emotions are good, yours and theirs

Respect is not just a song by Aretha Franklin

Become approachable

Do not interrupt to interject you opinion

Relax

Sarcasm is never useful

Posture sets a tone

Pleasantness is possible even during conflict

Detach from the people to see the issue or problem

Assume people are telling the truth first

Become comfortable with your strengths

Become comfortable with your weaknesses

Give people an opportunity to maintain their dignity , even when they are wrong

Solicit other opinions

Seek to understand others

Be an advocate for reconciliation

Take breaks

'Please' and 'thank you' are classics

Know the difference between formal and informal meetings

Only take notes when necessary

Express your feelings and opinions clearly and simply when possible

Optimism is stronger than pessimism

Appropriate praise does not make you lose power

Courtesy and kindness can work at the jobsite

Listen with attention

Speak with a pleasant tone

Pay attention to what your face is doing: grimace , rolling eyes, smiling

Do not fear losing all personal power with an apology, it builds bridges

Do not use an apology to take power, or the bridge will collapse

Remember people are generally good

Remember bad people do exist

Try different ways to interact with different people

Ask appropriate questions

Confront issues and not people

Do not avoid discussing personal issues that may impact your employees : death of a loved one, pet, divorce, birthday, wedding , graduation

How to Manage a Self-Evaluation

After filling out this questionnaire, determine the areas you want to change or keep the same. What would help you be your best?

Am I consistent?	Yes	No
Do my words match my actions?	Yes	No
Do my gestures match my words?	Yes	No
Am I condescending or sarcastic ?	Yes	No
Do people trust me?	Yes	No
Do I trust myself ?	Yes	No
Do I anticipate others' concerns?	Yes	No
Am I curious ?	Yes	No
Am I flexible?	Yes	No
Am I on task?	Yes	No
Am I on task emotionally?	Yes	No
Do I think results are more important than people?	Yes	No
Am I comfortable with my own emotions?	Yes	No
Am I comfortable with the emotions of others?	Yes	No
Am I open to learn from everyone?	Yes	No
Do I maintain my commitments and follow through?	Yes	No
Do I make excuses and blame others?	Yes	No
Do I value and work well with differences?	Yes	No
Am I having any fun?	Yes	No
Do I avoid conflict?	Yes	No
Do I foster conflict?	Yes	No
Do I enjoy leadership?	Yes	No
Are my communications purposeful?	Yes	No
Are my interactions calm?	Yes	No
Are my interactions chaotic ?	Yes	No
Do I manage problem solving without taking it personally ?	Yes	No
Do I have good support?	Yes	No
Do I have good resources?	Yes	No
Do I share credit with others?	Yes	No
Do I approach or withdraw from problem solving?	Yes	No
Do I have neutrality skills?	Yes	No
Do I motivate others?	Yes	No
Do I serve as an example of top ideals and ethical standards?	Yes	No
Do I reward?	Yes	No
Do I punish?	Yes	No
Do I back up my people?	Yes	No
Do I encourage others to grow?	Yes	No
Do I create obstacles?	Yes	No
Am I an obstacle ?	Yes	No
Do I ask others to do what I will not do myself?	Yes	No
Do I laugh ?	Yes	No
Do I relax?	Yes	No
Do I rise to the occasion?	Yes	No
Am I where I want to be?	Yes	No
Am I growing and learning on a daily basis?	Yes	No
Do I make realistic promises?	Yes	No
Do I protect confidentiality or sensitive data?	Yes	No
Am I honest?	Yes	No
Can I admit error?	Yes	No
Can I admit error graciously?	Yes	No
DO I FOLLOW A CODE OF ETHICS?	YES	NO

Personal Toolkit

How to Enhance Your Emotional Value as a Manager

How to Manage a Self-Evaluation

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