Internet Annoyances: How to Fix the Most Annoying Things about Going Online

I DON'T CARE IF I'VE GOT MAIL!

The Annoyance:

If I hear AOL's chirpy "You've Got Mail!" message one more time, I will pound my computer speakers into oblivion. How can I turn off this "Up with People" greeting?

The Fix:

You're not alone in this desire, and fortunately the fix is simple. In AOL 9.0, sign in and select Settings on the AOL toolbar. Click the By Category tab and choose the A-Z tab. Then click N-S, select Sounds, and uncheck the "Enable AOL sounds such as the Welcome greeting and Instant Message chimes" box (Figure 6-1). Click Save, and the voice will disappear. In AOL 8, select Settings Preferences, click the Toolbar & Sound link, and uncheck the "Enable AOL sounds box.

I VANT TO BE ALONE

The Annoyance:

With Version 8, AOL introduced a new annoyancethe AOL Companion. This pointless little applet launches whenever I connect to the Internet, whether I want it to or not. How can I send it away?

The Fix:

It's easy to kill the little critter. Click the small X in the upper-right corner of the AOL Companion to close it. AOL will pop up a dialog box asking if you really want to close it. You do, of course, but before clicking Yes, make sure you check the "Do Not Show This Message Again" box (Figure 6-2). That way, you won't be annoyed by this annoyance's annoying pop-up again.

WHO STOLE THE BACK AND FORWARD BUTTONS?

The Annoyance:

Can we please take AOL's browser out into the cornfield and shoot it? The #@$@#$#!%! thing doesn't even have Forward or Back buttons! Can't I do something as simple as go forward and backward between sites?

The Fix:

You're looking for buttons in all the wrong places. For some reason, AOL placed tiny forward and back buttons at the bottom of the AOL toolbar (just to the right of the QuickStart button), rather than in the browser window itself. You can also use Alt-Right Arrow and Alt-Left Arrow to move back and forth among pages you've visited.

STOP AOL WINDOW OVERLOAD

The Annoyance:

Windows, windows, and more windows! Whenever I use AOL, it seems to open about 537 windows, and I get completely lost navigating among them. The other day I even got an "open window limit" error message, and AOL wouldn't let me open any new windows. How can I close down all windows except one?

The Fix:

It's easy. On the AOL menu, select Window Close All Except Front. All the windows except the one on top will close. Unfortunately, this technique wont work on the AOL Welcome screen, because there's actually no way to completely close this screen. Even clicking the X in its upper-righthand corner doesn't close it; it only minimizes it.

CUT THE SCREEN CLUTTER

The Annoyance:

At times, my AOL screen has more windows than a skyscraper. How can I shut these panes in the neck?

The Fix:

AOL windows proliferate faster than rabbits, but there are a few ways to keep a lid on this population explosion. First, trim down the windows that open at startup. Like it or not, the Welcome screen and the AOL Channels bar on the left launch on startup, and there's nothing you can do to stop them. But you can stop other windows from launching. If you use AOL 9.0, go to Keyword: Start-up Settings. In the Additional Windows section, make sure that the None button is selected and click Save.

Next, tell your Buddy List not to load on startup. Go to the Buddy List setup screen (Keyword: IM Settings) and click the General Buddy tab. Uncheck the "Show me my Buddy List at sign-on" box, and click Save.

When you sign on, you'll only see the Welcome screen and AOL Channels. Close AOL Channels by clicking the X in its upper-righthand corner. You're now down to one window, the Welcome screen, which can't be closed. You can, however, minimize it by clicking the X in its top-right corner. Do that, and you'll see one of the Seven Wonders of the Computing World: an almost completely bare AOL screen (see Figure 6-3). If you'd like your Welcome screen to start minimized every time, choose Window Remember Window Size and Position.

SPEED UP THE LONG GOODBYE

The Annoyance:

Why does AOL take so $#@$# long to exit? And how can I speed it up?

The Fix:

The most likely culprit is the amount of space AOL has set aside for temporary art filesthat is, graphics used by your AOL software when you're online. (This is separate from the amount of space it sets aside for Internet Explorer temporary files.) By default, it sets aside 60 MB of space for its temporary art files; when you exit AOL, it deletes those temporary art files, which slows down your exit. So if you shrink the amount of space devoted to art files, you should speed up shutdowns.

To change the space allocation, click Settings on the AOL toolbar, click the AZ tab, click NS, and click Personal Storage Settings. The Personal Storage Settings dialog box will appear. In the Graphics Settings section at the bottom, select a number smaller than the default of 60 MB (for example, 20 MB), then click Save. That should solve the problem.

TURN OFF POP-UPS

The Annoyance:

It's bad enough that AOL litters my screen with windows, but even worse are the pop-ups that AOL constantly throws at me. How can I turn these off?

The Fix:

Luckily, it's simple to do. Go to Keyword: Popups, check the "Suppress AOL (R) member-only special offers" box, and click Save. While you're at it, check the "Suppress pop-ups from Web sites I visit using AOL (R) software" box, too (see Figure 6-4). When you visit web sites with the AOL browser, you'll eliminate their pop-ups, too.

STOP USPS JUNK MAIL

The Annoyance:

I recently subscribed to AOL, and now I'm getting tons of junk mail (the kind the postman brings to your door, not email) from AOL asking me to buy all sorts of stuff I don't need. How can I stop this flood of analog spam?

The Fix:

Names and addresses are worth big bucks to advertisers, and AOL, like many other businesses, sends "special offers" to its subscribers. Turn off the spigot by going to Keyword: Marketing Preferences, clicking "U.S. Mail from AOL," selecting the "No, I do not want to receive special offers from AOL by mail" option, and then clicking OK. While you're here, you can turn off other ways AOL annoys you with its special offers by clicking the appropriate button (Telephone, for example) and then selecting the "No" option for each.

MOVE FAVORITES FROM AOL TO INTERNET EXPLORER

The Annoyance:

I've finally had it with AOL's immensely annoying browser and am making the switch to Internet Explorer. But I've got over 100 Favorite Places in AOL, and I'd like to move them over to Internet Explorer. Why can't I do that?

The Fix:

If you've got AOL Versions 4, 5, 6, 7, or 8, FavoRipper (Figure 6-5) will do the trick. (Version 9 users, see below.) Download it from http://www.cablehead.com/downloads.htm, and after you install it, log into AOL. Then run FavoRipper, select your version of AOL (if you have Version 8, select Version 7it works for both), and click OK. Open your Favorites in America Online. Make sure all of your Favorite Places folders are open, then click OK, and they will be imported into Internet Explorer. They won't overwrite your existing Internet Favorites. Instead, they'll be placed in a new Favorites folder called Imported AOL Favorites. FavoRipper is shareware, and it will only import a limited number of Favorites unless you pay the $19.95 registration fee.

If you have AOL Version 9, or if you want an all-around Favorites and bookmark organization tool in addition to one that will allow you to import your AOL Favorite Places into Internet Explorer, download URL Organizer 2 from http://www.urlorg.com/urlorganizer2 (the program is shareware; registration costs $16.95). To import your Favorites from AOL into Internet Explorer using this tool, follow these steps:

1. In AOL, click the Favorite Places button.

2. Click the Save/Replace button at the bottom right of the Favorite Places window.

3. Select "Save My Favorite Places as a Favorites File on my Computer," and click OK.

4. Choose a location for saving the file (in PFC format, the only choice), and click Save.

5. Run URL Organizer 2, choose Lists Import, locate the PFC file you saved, select it, and import it. Your Favorite Places will be imported into their own folder in Internet Explorer.

GET HELP FROM A LIVE HUMAN BEING

The Annoyance:

I've tried using AOL's online help systembut then again, I've also tried winning the lottery and gotten the same results: zilch. Is there a way I can get a human being to walk me through my AOL problems?

The Fix:

One of AOL's best-kept secrets is its surprisingly good help, available via live chat and via 24/7 telephone support. To get help via chat, go to Keyword: Live Help. Click the Get LIVE Technical Help button, then click the Go to LIVE Help button, and a chat screen will launch (see Figure 6-6). In the top box, type in the name you want to be called during your chat (your "handle"). Type your question in the box underneath, and click Chat Now. A chat window will open, and pretty soon a tech support person will log on and answer your question.

If you prefer Mr. Bell's invention, there's a list of AOL support numbers at Keyword: Call AOL. Scroll down to the "To contact AOL by telephone" section and you'll find a list of numbers for all kinds of problems, including tech support, billing, account cancellation, and others. But if you're in a hurry, here are the main tech support numbers right now: Windows users should call 888-346-3704 or 800-827-6364; Mac users can dial 888-265-8007.

SAVE TECH SUPPORT CHATS

The Annoyance:

I've used AOL's chat help service, but I can't save the "conversation" from the session. If I highlight the text and press Ctrl-C or Ctrl-Insert, no text is saved. Nor can I choose Save from the File menuit's grayed out. There's gotta be a way to save this text!

The Fix:

AOL's chat support runs as an ActiveX control that lacks a save feature. However, if you select the text, right-click it, and select Copy, you can paste it into a program such as Notepad or Word and save it from there.

SAVE BETTER WEB GRAPHICS

The Annoyance:

When I use AOL's browser to find and save pictures on the Internet, they're saved in a format I've never heard of, and that no graphics program I have can read. What can I do?

The Fix:

In an attempt to speed up browsing, AOL uses the ART format, its own proprietary compression scheme for saving web graphics. But as you've discovered, almost no programs can read this format. One exception is Graphic Workshop Professional, available from http://www.mindworkshop.com/alchemy/gwspro.html, which can view ART and many other graphics file types, convert between formats, and do image editing. It's shareware; registration is $44.95. To look at ART files within AOL, choose File Open and select the file.

If you don't want to download Graphic Workshop Pro, there's a simple fix: tell AOL not to compress graphics. Then, when you save a web graphic, you can save it in a standard format (usually .jpg or .gif). From the AOL 9.0 toolbar, choose Settings and click "Internet [Web] Options." (In AOL 8.0, select Settings Preferences and click "Internet Properties (WWW).") Then click the AOL Browser tab, select "Never compress graphics," and click OK (see Figure 6-7).

Another benefit of turning off compression is that pictures on the Web will appear sharperAOL's compression tends to make them fuzzy.

GET CALLER ID NUMBERS FOR DROPPED CALLS

The Annoyance:

AOL's Voicemail system has caller ID built in, and if a message is left, the number is usually captured and saved as part of the email notification. But if a message isn't lefti.e., if the caller hangs upthe number is available only briefly, in a pop-up box. Once the caller hangs up, it's gone! Is there any way to retrieve this caller ID number?

The Fix:

Go to Keyword: Voicemail and click the View Call Log button. The log maintains a record of the last 100 calls you've received, even if the caller hung up and never left a message. (Although naturally, if the caller has blocked her number, you can't retrieve any information about her.)

UNINSTALL PREVIOUS VERSIONS OF AOL

The Annoyance:

The programmers who designed AOL must be packratswhenever I install a new version, the old one stays on my system. How can I uninstall the old versions?

The Fix:

At first this may seem impossible, since the Add or Remove Programs control panel only lists one AOL icon. But if you click the Change/Remove button next to the AOL icon, you'll get a list of all the AOL versions on your system, as you can see in Figure 6-8.

To delete them, highlight one or more versions and click the Next button. If there are any downloaded files, emails, or other files associated with that version stored in your filing cabinet that you want to save, make sure you check the "Downloaded files" and/or "Filing Cabinet files" boxes during the uninstall process.

STOP AOL FROM BOOTING YOU OFF

The Annoyance:

Last time I checked, the OL in AOL stood for "online"yet half the time I'm quickly booted off after I connect. What gives?

The Fix:

If you're using a dial-up connection and you have call waiting, an incoming call-waiting signal can kick you off AOL. Your best bet is to turn off call waiting for the duration of your AOL call. Here's how with AOL 9.0:

1. Sign off America Online.

2. On the Sign On screen, click the Sign On Options button.

3. In the Setup window, if you have only one location, click Edit Numbers. If you have more than one location, select a location and click Edit Numbers.

4. In the Edit AOL Access Phone Numbers window that appears, click Dialing Options.

5. In the Edit Dialing Options window, check the box next to "Dial *70." This will turn off call waiting for the duration of your connection to AOL.

6. If you use a code other than *70 to turn off call waiting, type that number into the box, then click OK.

7. Click OK to return to the Edit AOL Access Phone Numbers window, then click Next.

8. In the Summary window, click Sign On to AOL Now to sign on immediately.

In AOL 8.0, the sequence is a bit different: click the Setup button on the Sign On screen, click Edit Numbers, double-click the dial-up number you're using, and check the "Dial *70, to disable call waiting" box. Then click OK. From now on, call waiting will be disabled whenever you sign onto AOL, but it will turn back on after you log off.

For AOL 9.0 users, if call waiting isn't the problem, try using another AOL dial-in number:

1. On the Sign On screen, click Sign On Options, and then click Set Up Your Connection.

2. In the Setup window that appears, select a location and click Add Numbers.

3. Type in the area code from which you want to connect, and click Next.

4. In the Select AOL Access Numbers window that appears, select as many access phone numbers as you want from the list and click Next. (Insider tip: pick the numbers at the top of the listthey're usually the newest.)

5. Verify the information in the Confirm Your Selection window, and click Next.

6. In the Summary window, click Sign On to AOL Now.

In AOL 8.0, from the Sign On screen, click the Access Numbers button, enter the desired area code, click Next, and then follow steps 46.

Still no improvement? Try reducing the number of running programs before you sign onto AOL. Some modems are memory- and processor-dependent, and if your RAM and processor are busy with other programs, that may be the problem. If you're still having problems with your connection, get an updated driver for your modem. Check the manufacturer's web site, or go to AOL Keyword: Modem Software Update.

CHECK THAT LOCAL NUMBER!

The Annoyance:

I just read your sidebar "The Case of the $2,500 AOL Connection," and I d on't want my kids pulling this stunt when they come home. What can I do?

The Fix:

First, reconfigure AOL to dial only truly local numbers. From AOL's sign-on screen, click the Sign On Options button, click Add Numbers, and then enter your local area code. Pick dial-up numbers in your exchange (the first three digits of your seven-digit phone number). Then call your local phone company and confirm that these are truly local numbers.

If you get it wrong (or someone else changes the access number) and the visiting kids rack up a big long-distance phone bill, don't bug AOLit's not their fault. Contact your long-distance carrier and see if it will agree to eat the cost of the calls. Because of intense competition for customers, you can threaten to leave them for a competitor, and they may let you off the hook.

KEEP YOUR KIDS SAFE ON AOL

The Annoyance:

AOL is so easy, even a six-year-old can use it (no wisecracks about it being designed for six-year-olds, please). AOL itself is pretty PG, but there's a lot of seamy stuff on the Internet that my kids could access via AOL's browser. What's a parent to do?

The Fix:

AOL offers a set of built-in tools that stop kids from encountering objectionable material. To use them, go to Keyword: Parental Controls. Before you set the controls, you must create a separate screen name for each of your children.

When you set parental controls, you can block kids from going to certain potentially objectionable parts of the Internet and America Online, and you can restrict their access to certain servicessuch as chat and emailthat could be gateways to the seamy stuff. As with any kind of parental controls, they're not perfect. They're not particularly flexible, so you can't filter instant messenger content, for exampleyou can allow your kids to use instant messaging, or stop them from using it, but you can't allow them to use it and filter out messages based on the message content or sender.

In Parental Controls, you can use a set of prefab controls, or you can mix and match to create customized controls based on what you want to let each kid do online. It's much simpler to use the built-in ones, but they're also less flexible.

When you go to the Parental Controls area, you'll see a list of all of the screen names in your account, as shown in Figure 6-9.

You set Parental Controls for each screen name individually. Click a screen name, and you'll see the controls in place for that user. The choices are General, Kids Only, Young Teen, and Mature Teen. (If you don't want any controls set for a screen name, leave it at General, the default.) America Online recommends that Kids Only be set for kids aged 12 and under, Young Teen be set for kids aged 13 through 15, and Mature Teen be set for kids aged 16 to 17.

To change the controls for the screen name, click the Edit Age Category button (see Figure 6-10), choose the category you want to use, click Save, and then click Close. Alas, it's not crystal clear what the individual controls actually do or represent. Just taking a look at a bar or slider won't tell you the specifics of how it controls a category (e.g., Web Browsing), but clicking the "More about these controls" link will give you some details.

Here's the run-down of what the prefab Parental Controls settings do:

Kids Only

This setting lets kids (up to 12 years old) visit only one area of America Onlinethe Kids Only channeland visit only web sites that are selected by AOL for age-appropriate content. All other content areas and web sites are blocked; nor can kids send or receive instant messages. They can't join member-created or private chat rooms either, although they can visit public chat rooms in the Kids Only area. They can send and receive mail, but they can't send or receive file attachments or pictures.

Young Teen

This setting allows teens to visit some chat rooms, but not member-created or private chat rooms. They can visit only web sites that have been judged appropriate for kids under 15. They're also blocked from Internet newsgroups that allow file attachments. There are no restrictions on IM and email.

Mature Teen

This restricts teens' access to certain web sitesthey can only visit sites that have been judged appropriate for kids under. They're also blocked from Internet newsgroups that allow file attachments. There are no restrictions on IM and email.

Customizing Parental Controls

Parental Controls are one-size-fits-all. They treat all kids the same, and as any parent knows, no two kids are alike. Maybe you trust your kids to visit only appropriate web sites, but you're worried about their use of chat or email. America Online lets you mix and match controls any way you like. The controls offer broad ways to protect your kidsfor example, by not allowing them to visit private chat rooms, or blocking them from receiving emails with attachmentsand they let you create customized profiles (for example, limiting web access while providing unlimited email access). However, they offer only limited ways to customize each control. So, for example, you can either allow your kids to use instant messaging or block them from using it, but that's ityou can't block messages from specific people. (Although if you dig into AOL's mail controls at Keyword: Mail Controls, you can use the "Allow mail only from People I Know" to restrict messaging.)

To customize controls, go to Keyword: Parental Controls, and click the screen name of the user in question. Click the specific control you want to customize, change the options for it, then click the Save button at the bottom of the screenfor example, click "Chat control"to set controls for chat. (For once, logic from America Online!) Here's how you customize each control:

Web Browsing control

If you're worried that your kids are viewing inappropriate sites on the Web, use this control. You can limit them to sites appropriate for kids 12 and under, 15 and under, or 17 and under. However, you can't customize the control furtherfor example, you can't block access to specific web sites or domains, or, conversely, allow access to only specific sites or domains.

Instant Messaging control

You can completely block instant messaging, or limit it so that kids can't receive attached image, voice, or video files. You can't, as noted earlier, block IM by sender, or check a log to see whom your kids are sending messages to or getting them from.

E-mail control

This control is the same one you use when controlling spam and other email access. From here, for example, you can block mail containing files or attachments, block email by sender name, and even block mail by domain name. You can also create a list of people who are allowed to send your kids mail and block them from receiving mail from anyone else. (See the annoyance "AOL Chews Up My Email!" for more details.)

Chat control

You can block different parts of chat with this control. For example, you can block chat hyperlinks, so if someone sends your kid a link to an inappropriate web site, he can't click the link and go there. You can also block kids' access to chat rooms in the People Connection area, which is aimed at an older audience and includes a number of adult topics. Likewise, you can block access to member-created chat rooms in the People Connection area and block access to conference rooms (large chat rooms on America Online).

STOP AOL FROM DIALING UNNECESSARILY

The Annoyance:

I have a cable connection to the Internet, but every time I try to connect to AOL, it insists on dialing my old analog modem. Why hasn't AOL figured out I've gone broadband?

The Fix:

In spite of your new cable connection, AOL's software is still configured to dial your modem. To fix the problem, load the AOL software, and in the Location drop-down box, choose your cable modem connection rather than your dial-up connection. (The cable modem connection will most likely be labeled "ISP/LAN connection," or something similar.) Then click "Sign on," and you'll sign on using your cable connection, both now and in the future.

If you see only one connection in the Location drop-down box, you have a little more work to do. You're going to have to set up America Online to use your new cable modem. Here's how:

1. Click the Sign On Options button.

2. Click the Add a Location button.

3. Type in a name for the location (for example, "Home Cable"), and click Next.

4. A screen will appear telling you that America Online has detected that you have a broadband connection. Click Next.

5. If you want to sign onto America Online now, click Sign Onto AOL now. If not, click Make More Changes. You'll be sent back to the Setup screen. Click Close.

(The steps may vary, depending on your AOL version.)